Sufficient Champagne

I mean straight ones. And IRL. I mean, look, I know it’s a sorta offensive question, like asking if you can read,¹ but do you? The really intense Lemon-lovers I know are all ladies or very, very gentle men, so I have to wonder if there’s something you’re not telling the rest of us. Do you just watch it for Frank and Tracy Jordan? Is a girl in a Slanket singing “Night Cheese” officially a male masturbatory fantasy now—and if so, would you like my address? 30 Rock sometimes feels a little like the TV equivalent of a really brilliant romantic comedy: are you just tolerating it to get laid?

I guess what this comes down to is: Are you intelligent enough to like things you can’t fuck or eat.

I’m actually wondering now. This is actually going to bother me.